Strugglin'

First all - Want to welcome back to the cycling scene two very good friends!
First - a celebrity of this shitty blog - Andy Berger!
Andy had not one - but a duel hernia operation - OUCH! He got the hernias (plural) from having too much extra-curricular fun. I told him today he needs a trapeze for the bedroom.
Second - Michael Rawitscher!
Michael had major shoulder surgery - OUCH! He also got that from too much extra-curricular fun. However - instead of a trapeze - Michael needs a sling because he only uses his arm.

Just joking - Come on - Lighten the f- up!

Riding - Good weather has returned!

*Started riding after schoolwith Jeff, Michael and Bryan Sauter who has been coming up!
*Rode the HUB ride for the first time this year. This ride has been very typical of the start of this year. The pace was pretty wicked fast. When we hit Conway I was sitting fine and then the group kindof broke apart. I got stuck behind someone who was gassed and got pinched in - that was it - I was playing catch-up. With the help of Matthew, I caught the main group by the return trip on the outer-road. We hit the first hill at a nice slow pace allowing me to catch some breath but the second hill the pace picked way up - straight into the head wind which was super strong. I was sitting in the middle of group but I was hurting bad - I was really pissed at myself - I should of pushed myself harder - but I caved in. The minute I hit the wind my speed dropped by more than a third - they were gone. I could always see them for awhile as I struggled on my own. Jeff caught up with me and we rode in at a nice but aggressive pace. AHHHH!
*Tuesday Nite Worlds #1 - Number 42 is in the housefor all you horny chicks who want to come out a cheer me on! - which would basically be my wife and I'm not sure how horny she is - but it's my blog so I'll be as fictitious as I want.
Rode the first crit of the year - which was awesome. Met up at the Hub with Kevin and Bryan and rode down. In attendance for the B race was Me, Kevin, Bryan, Adam, and Robert. The best part was riding around with everyone all kitted up - it felt great to be back out. During the race I was aggressive and up-front for most of the race - I missed the break - it was on the left side and I was pinched in on the front - about 7 or 8 back - I could not go. This break held some big guns - and I knew it had a good chance to stick - and it did. I was behind Robert and we went off the front to get away - this failed and I found myself out in no-man's land - I was suffering - and fell on the back - but there were some slow fucks breaking even into the turn (no wonder they are on the back) and I was smoked and could not catch my breath - Robert sat on my wheel. After about three laps - there were two to go and I fell off - just like the Sat Hub ride - Shit. Bryan finished 1st in the pack sprint.
*Tuesday Nite Worlds #2 - I felt really tired and I took my sister out for BBQ at Pappy's and my belly was full! Put those two together and you have a suck-ass race. Left the HUb with Kevin, Bryan, Andy and Tim. The pace was wicked fast - a non-stop hammer fast - the speed never let up. In attendance - Kevin, Bryan, Bill, Robert, Stephanie (sorry if I forgot anyone) and a new guy Justin. I started out fine, but my stomach soon started to hurt. Also, I had no push out of the turn. After about 15 min I thought I was going to puke and I dropped out - SHIT this is becoming a 2010 pattern. I am writing this outing off. Kevin finished 5th. A large group rode back - that was fun.

Tomorrow is one of my favorite crits - Forest Park - however there is an 87% chance of T-Storms and based on my current feelings, I might pass. My biggest concern is nutrition - I need to drop some LBS!

Hello Once Again Franks - You Dirty Behemoth Bitch

It's good to get outside once again!
Friday - partied with Team Rev Grand Cru club. It was fun. I was given the name Seaman Chris.

Saturday - Solo ride outside after weights - was pretty cold but it felt good. DId Wild Horse Creek to Ossenfort to HWY T to St. ALbans and than back - or I should say up - Melrose and back.

Sunday - I rode inside

Monday - took day off

Tuesday - Spun at the Hub. Good times - I think we are at the end. A lot of people showed up and it was quite the party at the end. Judy was sporting the new Hub Team t-shirt (over her awesome big tits!). If you want one, let me know. They are back-ordered and quite in demand! (her boobs, not the t-shirt).

Wednesday - OH yeah! Scream it baby - I finally started to commute to Harris Stowe again. It was a great ride down - tail wind all the way with a nice temp. I saw my good friend Michael R talking with some smoking hot chick - He was "walking the dog"
Coming home was nice but pretty cold.

Thursday - no riding but I did go to The Hub for a little POKER! I made it farther than I have ever before - down to the final table - I lost in the most shitty of ways - but that is luck. Got home way to late - around 1:30 - and a little buzzed - made for a rough start in the morning.

Friday - went on a nice ride with Judy after we got home - rode up Ballas and made her suffer.

Saturday - AH - the ride of pain. 80 miles of gut wrenching pain. The ride:
Parked at Gizz Swallow
to Wild Horse Creek
up Ossenfort (saw the Gizz Swallow ride - looked small
Bouquet
Fox Creek
through Eureka to Pacific
Hwy F (for Fuck)
Hwy FF (for Fat Fuck)
HWY W
to Hwy PP/Twin River Road
Franks (Fucking Hard) I looked down at one several points and Franks had a grade of 27 percent at one point!
When I stopped to take this picture I almost could not get started!
Antire
Jim Weber (Fucking hard)
back Hwy W
to 109 through Eureka
Forby Rd/Alt (Fucking Hard)
HWY 109
Melrose (Fucking Hard)
back to Ossenfort
Wild Horse Creek
and back to Gizz Swallow!

On a side note - I swapped out my powertap in the Zipp and put it in my Reynolds - should be ready early next week. I also got a used Zipp Hub to rebuild the wheel.

Also Judy and Isabella finished their Frostbike ride
- Thanks to Team Rev and Suzanne for helping them!

Will Winter Ever End?

Check out this photo from MySpace!She forgot to flush - AHHHHHH!

The training has been going good. Trying to keep to the schedule and I have really enjoyed the weights part of it - I thought I would hate it - but it has become a painful pleasure. I also got my power readings -
Functional Threshold Power = 215 watts
Zone 1 active recovery <118 watts
Zone 2 aerobic 120 – 161 watts
Zone 3 tempo 163 – 194 watts
Zone 4 lactate threshold 196 – 226 watts
Zone 5 VO2max 228 – 258 watts
Zone 6 anaerobic capacity 260 – 323 watts
Zone 7 neuromuscular power MAX POWER (>325+)
a little low from what I thought they would be - but I hate doing this stuff inside. I do not know if my numbers were right, but at least it is a place to start.

I got to admit I am tired of riding inside - Tuesday Night Hub spin has gotten huge and co-ed. Judy has been coming which has been really cool.

I decided to bail on Froze Toes. Too far to drive to little of a race - oh well. I am debating about Dogwood but Forest Park Crit is 100 percent a go!

Last Saturday was the first great day all winter. After lifting weights at SEG, I went out for a nice long ride to Saint Albans with about 12 Gizz Swallow guys all kitted out. They laid down a killer pace as we went out Wild Horse Creek to Ossenfort - by the time of the hill, I was smoked and started to drop off. That sucked because I was kitted in Hub, but I was smoked from the 2 hours of weights and plyos - hey, I did over 200 lateral cone hops - and that was just a fraction of it! It was a great ride and it felt great to be out. While we were headed out I took a couple of turns at the front and the Gizz Swallow guy behind me says "I'm glad no one is taking pictures - one Hub guy pulling 12 Gissallo guys!" That felt pretty cool.

The best part of the winter has been Isabella - She joined the Team Rev Frostbike Mountain Bike - and has loved riding! Man - 8 years old and out hitting the trails - even in the snow!
She rocks.

winter has been sucking for me

This winter has just sucked for - little motivation.
It has consisted of riding inside - and going out.

So here is the re-cap:

Spinning: I have really tired to keep to my training schedule - riding in the basement just sucks.
Spinning at The Hub is a little better.




Going Out - I swear, I have been outside riding maybe three times since the new year. Last week was my longest ride - I started with The Hub and broke out and rode to OTF in Chesterfield. I was planning on riding back home but I was way behind on time and Phil drove me home. We have only had one outside ride and no after school rides! AHHH! I did not ride yesterday because I was so fucked up and I did not ride today because of football and I felt like a lazy ass.

The Other Going Out: I bunch of us (Devin, Ron, Andy, Loren, Matthew, Kate) met last Wed. at the Roadhouse to watch Kevin jam with David's Guitar Loft. He rocked. Kevin played Sultan's of Swing and Moby Dick (I felt awkward when Kevin gave me a shout-out before the second song!)
Friday night I met up with Loren, Andy and Alex, with the wives to see Sarah Borges at a bar in Maplewood. All I know is I got really ripped and missed weights and riding! Oh yeah - check this out - Loren met his doppleganger:
A big Shout out to my kids - not only did we have one nice day to get out and ride - but Grace rode for the 1st time with no training wheels!

Knocked down

The holidays have come and gone - and man am I feeling it.

First Christmas: See the bikes! Judy's new Scott and Bella's new Kona - Nice.
The big present leaning against Judy's bike is a poster of Mark Cavendish for her office at work. She admires him for all of his wins - or something like that. (why does my wife always stare at the center point of the photo?) Hey - I don't mind. If she gets Cavendish, than I can have Julie Krasniak! All's fair.
A better picture of her.
Travel - Chicago - Went to Garmin store and missed Christian VandeVelde by one day promoting the new Garmin Edge 500.
I did the see window homage to him!

Cycling - Ahhh. now there's the problem. Well the holidays and travel left me with no riding. OK a week off - not the end of the world. While people around me are talking about their commitment to the bike - I'm off and kicking back. I return on Friday just in time to get really sick. Do not know what hit me - but it did - big time. I went to Off The Front on Sat. for weights and out for a quick bite with Phil - and than Bam - I was out with a fever. I missed Sunday, Monday... I was going to ride at The Hub tonight but was not feeling up to it. Tomorrow I will spin.

Bill has high expectations for me - so I must deliver. The Hub has the be strong - all the guys going to this coach of from Ghissalo - mostly cat 4's!!!!! Yeah - I know them all. They are a good bunch of guys - but when it's race time - it's on!

Merry CXMAS

Man - where to start... Ryan - talked with Eric and he wants to hire you as the mascot for Bunny Cunt! With all those hunters today - you're lucky it's deer season.
*Started with my coach - so far great stuff. Above all it has really made me think about everything - from food to riding - a complete picture. I have started keeping a daily journal of everything. This week the plan was:
Mon - spin 45 min.
Tues - spin 45-90 min - 3X120 in/out sprints
Wed- Spin
Thurs - 2(3X30) sprints
Fri - rest
Sat - 30 - 60 min (hill heater intervals)
Sun - Volume/race simulation

Mon - spinning inside to the Family Guy!
Tuesday - Spinning at The Hub. - I did not follow the tape but did my drills - It's easier to ride with peopleand a beer afterwards always rocks.
Thursday - Unbelievable weather - mid 50's for December. Rode after-school with Jeff. A nice longer ride - did my intervals. That night, decided to keep the riding going by doing our night ride with Rock, Joe and Andy Berger! - rode the Maplewood route - it was awesome to be outside!
Saturday - Went to Off the Front for weight training.
I'm telling you - this was an ass kicker! I think I used muscles not used....ever? It felt great - Chris said I would be sore in about 48 hours - well - it's just about 48 hours and he is pretty much right on! I am in fucking pain!
Saturday night was the HUB PARTY! I arrived late due to a little Christmas shopping - when I arrived the party was in full swing
what I mean is beer - a lot of beer - a keg...coolers... you know shit loads of beer. The beer pong table was totally cool. Everybody was in attendance - the party was rocking. Positives - seeing everybody:
The party lasted until the wee hours - I got home at two o'clock. The party was truly a blast. The tire changing contest took the party to new heights ending in a great shrimp fight from the first to the second floor and Ron getting bit by Lendell. Many people were hurting the next day - for sure.
Sunday - It was on the Donkey Kong's dick - That's right CX-MAS! Year two - bring it on (hey - at least it wasn't 7 degrees!) Rode out with El Cavano and following was Devin, Bitch Tits and Devin's buddy. Was this going to be exciting - hell yeah - going down the highway - Devin pulls along side and yells to look backwards - my bike had flown off loren's rack and was hanging by a bungie cord. After putting the bike back on - out to Lost Valley. The Hub was well represented - In attendance was El Cavano, Devin (last year's runner-up because he throws a Huffy like a pussy), BitchTits, Heine in the bunny suit, Rock, Robert and Nate. I was blown away by the numbers - final count was almost 140 riderscrazy! I saw the usual people and many I have not seen in years - this was awesome. The ride was fantastic - some single track, but mostly double track and gravel roads. The biggest problem was a lot of ice. We started by getting call ups and then the race was on. Devin had to start out on a Huffy until the first checkpoint. we all started and as we headed down the first of the single track - going straight down hill, Devin and BT's friend wiped out right in front of me by going over the bars - he cracked his helmet - and he popped up sitting as I was headed right for him I slammed my breaks - but I have real cross brakes (Spooky with Malhaussen pads) and stopping was not an option, so I bailed into a baseball slide and slid right into him. If I had bailed I would have wrecked hard by t-boning him. I got right up and was like - are you OK? He was not. BT was right there and after a short stop - Joe and I headed off to tell the guys at the first checkpoint - scary stuff - but going down was really common. Going into the first checkpoint, my bike slid right from under me and I landed hard for my second down - luckily it was on my left side (the same side as I did the first time) because although the crash did not hurt - on the ice, my guts on my bike would have been trashed. Also - Carrie Cash was right there to see this and heckled me something good. My left thigh is killing me!
Obstacles - Freaking awesome - 1st stop involved a PBR slam. 2nd stop involved a shot of Jim Beam and a slice of bacon.3rd stop included eggnog - the winner drank 15 cups of eggnog! I could only muster 2.
The ride was great - I rode with Loren and Joe Jr. from Mesa. We had a nice and easy pace and overall did pretty good. The scenery was beautiful with the snow. This ride was one to remember - And Devin won! A kickass trucker hat!
Heini - quit taking pictures of me taking pictures of you!

Winter and Christmas gifts

Well - winter has set in - Christmas is around the corner - miss the mild temps - Where did Global Warming Go!!!!! I like that stuff!

With winter comes spinning at The Hub:Always fun - always beer afterwards.

Other highlights included Highway 40 with the family:


And a trip to go to Cat 3 Hubber Eric Seaver and his band Bunny Cunt:
They were awesome - or I was really drunk - or both!

Christmas and biking go hand in hand - so after I signed a paycheck over to Ron here it goes:

The one kid: Kona Hula - SWEET! (Too bad the younger one always gets the clothes and the bike hand-me-downs)

The Wife: Scott CR1 Team - nice bike!

Me: Chris King "mango" headset for the Jake the Snake, Lizard Skin orange tape, and a "mango" Salsa Seatpost clamp and a WCS Carbon Seatpost. Soon to come - "mango" spacers and Chris King "mango" bottom bracket! This is one pimp bike.

And - I bought a person! Not like that!
Chris Maleski and Off The Front Coaching. I'm pretty excited about this - beginning tomorrow! I will become a stud!